The viciously specific school supplies have been stashed in the new backpacks: 6 paper folders in different primary colors, 1 red plastic folder with two metal tabs, 2 broad-ruled 100 page notebooks, and 12 Crayola blunt tip markers (no neon!)
The outfits are laid out at the end of the beds, creases carefully smoothed away, like silent soldiers ready for battle. There was much discussion today about what shirt would convey the right message, would say "I'm friendly and fun, why don't you get to know me?" Cinderella didn't give her outfit as much thought as we did today.
We are ready. As ready as we'll ever be.
But yet I fought back tears tonight as I tried to soothe Bella's anxiety and ease her into sleep. I struggled to keep my composure when I asked her to voice her fears, to articulate the worst thing that could happen, and she answered, "I'm worried that I'll do something embarrassing and that all those kids who don't know me will decide they hate me forever."
I reassured her, told her that everyone would love her, as they loved her in Ohio. I suggested some questions to get conversations going, questions apparently out of touch enough to make her crack a smile. But deep inside, my fears grew. I worried if this student body would be the type to make fun of a new girl, if cliques would remain tightly closed off to her, and if she would be forced to roam the cafeteria aimlessly searching for a welcoming table. I closed my eyes and wished with all my might that her tentative glance will be met with a warm smile tomorrow.
When I left the room, she was peacefully sleeping, all worry lines erased from her face. But now I'm the one with the back to school jitters.
6 comments:
We are in the same boat! New city, new school, same sweet kids! Sending positive vibes and love from Austin!
BTW, my friends in Chicago are furious we didn't move with you! ;-)
Best of luck to Bella! My grandson is starting school here in our very small town and will be the new kid. He was a little apprehansive, but now is starting to get excited about making some new friends. He makes friends easily, so hopefully he'll fit right in. They don't start here till September 1st!
I know exactly how you feel Vanessa. I spent all of last summer fighting back, and sometimes not fighting back the tears. My daughter is starting first grade Monday and my son, 3 day preschool and altohugh i welcome the time to work, it is another reminder that they are growing up and away. Sigh
I hope the day went well!
Here's hoping the day went well and the year is off to a great start!
Best wishes from Texas!
I hope Bella's first day was wonderful! She is a true joy to teach and we miss her here at Bailey! Many hugs, Mrs. Guerin
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