Being Both

This holiday season feels really different. Not just because we're in a major recession and I feel guilty about every purchase I make. But because it's the first time since I first moved in with Steve that I've had to define our religious choices. I agonized in late summer over whether to send Bella to Hebrew school at the local temple, and ended up withdrawing her from the program. Since then I've given a lot of thought to what we are: Jewish or Interfaith.

Deciding to not sign Bella up for formal religious education made me realize that I still consider our family to be Interfaith rather than simply Jewish, even though I converted to Judaism after Bella was born. We celebrate all the big Jewish holidays, but we also celebrate the fun, secular aspects of Christmas and Easter. I talk to the kids about God, heaven, and hell, but it's time to take their religious education to another level by introducing some Bible stories. I've always felt that it was important to give your children a strong religious identity, but I was really uncomfortable with giving them one that was not my own. I'm excited to try some religious home schooling - I think it may be the perfect thing for us.

Tonight was the true kick-off of the holidays for us. Both of my sisters arrived along with my brother in law and my nieces. Once the kids were fed, we opened up the box of ornaments that we have had since we were kids and we trimmed the tree. The Christmas carols were blasting and the kids were calling out each time they found another favorite ornament that they'd forgotten about since last year. Just like we did when we were little, our children played with shiny balls and asked for our help in reaching the tall branches.

Once the tree was trimmed, we turned off the music and moved into the kitchen to light candles for the first night of Hannukah. The mood turned solemn and reverent as the children recited the unfamiliar Hebrew prayer. Once the candles were lit, they danced around, going from room to room, admiring the sparkling tree and the glowing candles.

A few weeks ago, Bella sat in the back of the car with a friend and the conversation turned to religion. Bella asked her friend if she was Christian and the friend answered, "Yes. I'm Catholic. What are you?" Bella said, "I'm both. I'm Christian and I'm Jewish." The friend challenged, "You can't be both!" And Bella answered confidently, "Of course you can. That's what I am. I have a tree and I have Hannukah. I have the best of everything."

Seems like so far, her dual identity is working for her.

Happy holidays!